Unsubscibed

So, I got two comments on my previous post, apparently from the same person.  Someone named Anonymous.  I'll have to see if that name has any specific meaning.

First they said:

Should have stuck with wow.

Then they felt the need to come back and let me know that they were:

Unsubscibed.

Seems like something they could have done the first time.

Maybe they'll make a third post when they find the "r" they are missing.


On a more serious note, I had actually hoped to avoid antagonizing anyone, despite how that post and this response seem.  I had my "announcement" post up specifically because I wanted people to be able to avoid a politics discussion if they wanted.  As I said then, I can appreciate the desire to keep politics out of escapism.  It's nice, in principle, to have a place to retreat when the world is too much.  But the thing is, that place of retreat isn't always the "neutral" place you think it is.  In many ways, the rigid structure of a game world makes the issues of the world more obvious.

Simple examples?

Skin tone variation is pretty limited in WoW
Body dimensions are even more restricted
In-game, NPC same-sex relationships not exactly common

Now, to the first two items - well, there can be an argument made about coding and the endless myriad of combinations that would need to be accounted for.  But while the coding argument has a fair basis and certain defaults must occur, it doesn't address where the line is drawn between what is included and what is excluded.  It doesn't acknowledge that the same default is used across so many games and how that can make some players feel, time after time after time.

And yes, not everyone cares.  Some people want to be the Platonic ideal of hero and there is nothing wrong with that.  But for those that do care and feel excluded, the world that you see as a place where we are "all the same" isn't the place you think it is.

But for Anonymous, I have to say, I'm kind of sorry you left.  Well, okay, not really as it seems like you are averse to others having strong opinions that do not match yours.  But, while I'm writing this for me, just me, and only me, I would like to be able to convince others to listen to my point of view and perhaps change their ideas.  I can't say I want to change my ideas and opinions about the world, but I hope that if I was convinced someone else was right that I would have the courage to re-evaluate myself.  I know I've done it before and likely will again.

Oh well.  Well, here's a bit of WoW for ya: Spouse and I are working on the Netherwing rep grind right now.  Oh, and the Shieldwall rep quests too.  Between the broken quests and the slow grind, whee those are fun.

So, where have I been? And what’s next?

In short, restricting this blog to just WoW made it difficult to post when other, more important things came up.  I wanted to talk about WoW (and what I was doing and what was going on in game), but there were also bigger things happening and they weren’t appropriate for what this blog was.  This really made it difficult to post at all, which then slowed all other momentum and then stopped me completely.

I’ve decided to modify this blog and open it up to more than just WoW and I wanted to let my readers know before I made the move.  I’ve always appreciated the attempt most bloggers make to keep politics and real-life to a minimum when talking about the game.  It’s not fully possible, nor is it a good idea, to completely avoid real-life concerns in a game though.  And I don’t just mean idiots talking politics in trade chat.  I mean topics that touch on real-life issues of the players.  Still, I do appreciate and embrace the need for escapism so that you can handle reality.  On the other hand, some never get to fully escape because our shared fantasy world is swimming in normative reminders of real life that may be invisible to most people.  And to pretend that we are all the same erases the issues some people face.

Whatever the case, I will still be posting on Warcraft and related whatnot, so I hope to be able to still have conversations with my readers.  But there will be other topics floating around as well and I wanted to give a heads up to readers and the people that added me to their blogroll in case they like to keep those lists tightly focused on WoW or at least gaming.

I started this post a while ago and have been trying to get it finished and posted.  I wanted to say more and edit it and refine it, but it is unnecessary and I need to make the switch soon.

The above was the summary of the navel-gazing below. 

When I first started this blog I briefly hit on the why of it:

Why am I doing this? 

I don’t know. Well, that’s not strictly true. I have some ideas of why but it would be hard to put them into words. I think, for now, it would be safe to say that I’m doing this because I want to.

 

There were a number of reasons but one, among the many, was possible depression*.  At the time, writing those posts was giving me an escape and a way of dealing with things. It was one tool that helped me cope and I think it did it well. 

One of things I have liked about having this blog is that I have tried to keep it focused on WoW as much as possible.  I was able to leave other things out and just focus on the game.  Now though, I’m feeling more and more confined by some personal limits I set that I think are preventing me from using this platform for what I want and need.

I’m in the US and as you are likely aware, we are having our presidential election this year. During the primaries I had quite a bit to say and as we move to the general election I’m sure I’ll have even more.  In addition, there are just too many things going on in the world that I'm not talking about and I want to.  While the internet doesn't really need one more opinion out there, I need to be able to talk about things.  I need to be able to talk about this letter.  I need to be able to talk about Orlando.  Even if there is no one to listen, I need to be able to write about it .

Moving forward

I was absolutely tickled when I was added to some side bars on a few blogs, and by people that I really enjoyed reading!

I guess that’s why I want to make this post.  I am planning to transition this blog to something less focused purely on WoW and be more of a personal journal, of sorts.  I still plan to post and talk about WoW, especially with Legion approaching, but I won’t feel like I have to edit myself quite so much.

And since I’ll be bringing in my opinions on various controversial topics, I wanted to make readers aware, especially those that added me to their side bar.  It's important to say that I'm not doing this because I'm mad at anyone that added me or any nonsense like that.  In fact, it is quite the opposite.  It is because of my gratitude that people took an interest in my limited writing that I want to alert them as I change topics.

[And here is where I've been editing and deleting and revising. As I mentioned above, there is too much going on for me to keep waiting until this perfect.  So please forgive the clumsiness of this post.  I think the main idea comes across.  I'll leave this up for a few days so that anyone who wants to remove me from their reading can.]

* I was never officially diagnosed with depression, because I never went to a doctor about it.  Which I know can sound like a red flag, but I honestly never felt it quite hit that stage. A risky thing, I know, but I did talk with the spouse and we both kept an eye on things.  As a quick reminder, depression isn’t sadness.  For formal, clinical information, go here:

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/depression-what-you-need-to-know-12-2015/index.shtml

But for a good, deeply emotionally and resonant view, go here:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2013/05/depression-part-two.html

How do I get back up on this horse?

In order to 1) bury my previous post of shame (in the hope that it is lost to time) and 2) try to get back to this, let's create a post!

I have been absent from blogging and commenting for a number of reasons. The two main reasons were being busier at work and having a hard time getting into this account at work.  Work is less busy now, but I'm still having some troubles logging on.  Still, I'm able to get in today so I want to get back to this.

When I was here last there was a very wide ranging conversation going on about LFR and such.  Things have moved on to 6.2.3 and Legion, but it was interesting while it lasted.  I'll probably hit up on it soon and reply to what was said, even if it's really just talking to myself.  It helps me to think through this some.  I'm not sure I'll really be able to add much to what has already been said.

Speaking of 6.2.3 and Legion...I'm disappointed in the moose situation. Fiannor pretty much hits what I would need to say, both in the post and the comment that follows up.  I haven't really been reading much on Legion...it's too far out for me (as in number of months) and what is out tends to be depressing to me.

A few things I wish weren't happening
Combat Rogue change
Hunter Change
Frost Death Knight dual wield only
Removal of Mistweaver melee/healing idea (Fistweaver if you must call it that)
Removal of Gladiator Stance


The thing I'm looking forward to:
Transmog change

I'm very excited about the account wide transmog thing, but I'm confused.  Everyone seems excited about this and like it is a done deal.  Perhaps I've been too pessimistic, but I'm not counting on that until it is in game, live, and I've used it.  Blizzard has promised way too many things for an expansion that were dropped from game (Path of the Titans).  Am I being too pessimistic or is everyone just so caught up in the hype that they've forgotten how much is promised at Blizzcon and what makes into the final game?

As above, you'll notice that I listed class changes a lot.  I'm not against change.  In fact, I hate keeping something the way it is simply because of tradition or momentum.  But I just don't understand why they feel the need to change it and, more importantly, they are once again telling me the proper fantasy for the class.

Now, it is their game, so yes, they can say whatever they want about their classes in their game.  But there is something in how Blizzard goes about doing this sort of thing that comes across less "this is our idea of this trope. this is our take on it" and more "here is the one and only proper way to understand this idea".  They do this with many things but this class remake, and especially the "fantasy" buzzword they keep throwing around really rubs me the wrong way.

And this all leads back to why I'm not really reading much or talking much about it.  Because if I do, I'll have to acknowledge how the game and I continue to part ways.  And if I look too long into that void, I might begin to see that maybe this is the end for me.

I'm trying not to give up on the game, because it has been so fun for me and such a great escape when I needed it.  But when I look at what I want in a game and where Blizzard has been and continues to head, I just don't know how long I'll be continuing on.

Sorry to end on the more down note.  This format is not great at expressing emotion.  I'm not really that down, although I'm pensive about it all.  Just wondering where it all goes from here.

I'll try to get back to blogging more regularly.  If my next post in about my wrap-up on LFR thoughts, it might be about deleting characters and why that is a challenge for me and why I'm still trying to find a few.

613,526 (nevermind, I'm an idiot)

Update seconds later:

I wasn't thinking, that's just the YouTube Subscribers number.  I'm leaving this here as evidence of my post but yeah, this is a lesson in thinking things through before posting.

Original post begins here
---------

I know I've been gone a while, and I'll get to that soon.

But, have you watched the new Legion trailer that is in the Battle.net launcher?

If you mouse over the image in the lower right corner, you see this

It says:

World of Warcraft

613,526 subscribers

I haven't watched the rest of the trailer, maybe that says how many people have bought the expansion?  Or how many people there are now?  Or I don't know.  I just thought it odd and worth mentioning.  I know some numbers were just released so maybe that is this?  But to give such an exact number seems weird.  I don't know, just odd.

On my impromptu hiatus

So, where have you been?

I've been waiting here.  The whole time.

What do you have to say for yourself?

In the same vein of truth-telling, trade chat is full of articulate, well-reasoned discussion.

To the actual reasons for my absence:

- the IT department at my work changed...something...and as such it has become a bit more challenging to log in at work.
- work has been a bit busier of late.
- when I'm at home, I typically want to play WoW if I'm on the computer, so I'm not really writing at home.

It really wasn't any one thing, just a confluence of events.

But what have I been doing in game?

Having fun exploring content, although very little in Draenor.

The spouse and I finally hit the Isle of Giants and have had fun getting pets and mounts.  At 100, our hunters are just tearing through things. This is good because we aren't the only ones there so, if we don't move quickly, the place will be empty in no time.  We're both working on the 9,999 bones, although neither of us really care about the mount; other than as the count towards the next mount achievement.  It's a fun place to just hunt, skin, and collect while we zone out together and/or talk about the stresses of work and the day. (addendum: the spouse was having ridiculous luck tonight - in about 10-15 minutes two Direhorn Runts dropped as did somewhere around 4-5 Zandalari raptors. I can't remember if it was the Anklerenders, Footslashers, Kneebiters, or Toenibblers. It doesn't matter, it was amazing.

We had another pet-focused goal recently, this one back in Deepholm.  Neither of our hunters had finished the Deepholm quests, so we hadn't unlocked the dailies (another problem with leveling too fast in old content). So in order to be able to tame Jadefang and get the Tiny Shale Spider, we had to finish the storyline in Deepholm and then wait for the daily to pop-up.

Huh, just thought of another few pet/mount goals we did.  We finished the quest line to get the Lashtail Hatchling in Zul'gurub and the Amani Battle Bear in Zul'Aman.

Beyond that, my main playing has been the drudgery of the Brewfest dailies. I wanted the one pet, some toys I didn't have, and perhaps an heirloom upgrade.  So grinding out the back and forth of delivering kegs.  I kind of like Brewfest overall, but having this chore does take some of the fun out of it.  To be fair, I didn't have to get any of that so it was self-imposed.  Still, I like being able to experience the "holiday" more than I did this time.  Not specifically this holiday.  Just those holidays in general.

Also, I'm perilously close to breaking 100,000 gold on my first character ever.  Some people never see that amount of gold and others make that without trying.  For me, making gold have never been a talent.  I'm not working at it with any great effort right now, mostly follower missions at this point.  But it took a bit of work to get this far and I'm happy to reach this goal.

I hope to get back in the swing of things here as I enjoyed this and it was a great outlet for me.  I also enjoyed reading and commenting on other people's blog, so I hope to be able to get back to that.

Rambling: No focus

I've been a bit busy outside of the game so I haven't really had much thought of what to write.  I've got about 6 drafts in my folders that I want to write on but I don't have the time to make them what I want, so just to keep things moving I'm going to write semi-stream of consciousness.  So apologies on the random, rambly nature of this.

I hate Proving Grounds: Silver.  I have two warlocks that are 100 (which is an oddity for me) that can't get into heroics because I can't get past silver proving grounds.  I haven't given it a lot of effort yet, but I've tried a few times and changed spec and I can just tell that I'm going to have a hell of a time doing this.  I probably need to out gear it by a lot before I can do it.  And even that might not be enough.

But doesn't that mean the proving grounds is doing its job?  Keeping out low DPS like me?  Not pulling down the group?  Maybe?  Beside the fact that I'm pretty sure I've seen a number of warlocks having trouble with proving grounds, I don't think I'd be hurting things that much to be in dungeons. But if I am, then it's kind of unfair to put more stories and quests that I'll never be able to do behind heroic dungeons.  At least, it feels that way.

That's a whole other topic I mean to get into one day - fairness and difficulty.  Part of what got me thinking about that topic was this:

"Legend rank is home to less than the top .5% of Hearthstone players. Out of the millions of players playing Hearthstone, these Legends make up an incredibly small part of the Hearthstone player base."

In a PvP setting this makes some sense - you can't all be the top as there isn't an AI you are playing against.  But the honest truth is, of the millions of people playing, the VAST majority will NEVER see the top content.

There is a carrot on a stick that they tempt you with knowing that millions of people will never get it.  It's one thing to have a very, very hard to get carrot that anyone can get with enough time.  But that just isn't possible here.  And that bothers me.  It bothers me that they are touting it as if it is something that you can get when the reality is, nope, probably not.  It bothers me the amount of development time that they put into something that less than 1/2 of 1 percent of people will EVER see.  I just don't get or really like that.

It is part of why I like LFR in principle (in execution is another discussion).  Prior to LFR I never got to see the story of the expansion to the end.  And I hated that.  One thing that WoD did kind of right (although with a lot of missteps) is that some of the story is clearly told outside of raids and dungeons.  They still have big key parts in raids and dungeons but with LFD and LFR I can see those now.

Pherian (godmother? what do you use?) over at Alt-ernative Chat is always an interesting read.  I don't always agree with her, sometimes quite a bit, but I pretty much always find it is worth my time to read her (when I can get access at work).  The other day she had a great idea that I really liked.

What would I like to see Professions mean to me in Legion?

It is time to cut the crap and head straight for the Cosmetic, it seems to me. Gear is all well and good, and a mount that's BoP and I can only make once? Stick that on a vendor and make me earn a special Crafting Currency to purchase it. What I need to be able to make should have value to me and others, but mostly allow me a unique earning stream. So, it is time for Cosmetics, Blizzard.

This is a great idea! I don't fully agree with the appeal of the grinding for a rare drop but I appreciate the idea and where it is coming from.  Overall though, this could be a really interesting way to revitalize professions.  I'm not sure how practical it is but perhaps a slow start is good.  That has drawbacks too of course, but if Blizzard can better manage expectations by saying "we're introducing a new idea and rolling it out slowly as we develop it" and THEN give updates as it goes, I think it could be a good idea.

I think I'll put this up now.  I could have this open all day and just keep adding and such as I go along but it is already too much.

Back to my semi-focused topic posts next week.  I'll be AFK this weekend so my next update might be post flying.  And I've got a post I really want to do but I want a screencap to go with it.  Probably something everyone else knows but it kind of blew my mind.

On the pressure to produce content

So I was doing my usual Reading of The Blogs and was on Naiv's site when I noticed something strange.

My blog was on the links.

Whoa /Joey Lawrence

At first I thought it was amazing and cool.  Wow, someone not only read my words but also thought others might want to read them.  Crazy.

And almost immediately, I was hit with a mini-panic - that means others are actually reading what I write!

Yes, of course that was always the point but there's something about the reality of it happening that just struck me.  And then I was hit with this pressure to consistently produce quality posts and soon.

Cue further mini-panic.

After I got my head about me, I started to think about what that really meant for me.

One of the classic pieces of advice for writers, especially bloggers, is that you need to write for yourself. If I was doing this for a paycheck, I might need to tailor what I write for an audience, but I'm not, so that isn't an issue.

What I need to do, and plan to do, is write for me as best as I can. I need to work at a pace that works for me. I need to write about what interests me and in ways that I like. And if no one comes for my conversations, that's okay. Because if I'm having a conversation I don't enjoy but it pulls in lots of people, that won't be fun. And if I do end up actually attracting readers, the ones that come and stay will ultimately be ones that like (or at least understand) my writing quirks. Which will make my writing more natural and easier.

Since I'm still new at this (12th post right here and testing the scheduled post out for a second time) there is quite a bit to learn. This might seem like an odd post in and of itself, more like it should be an internal dialogue with myself. True to a point. I want to put this up for three reasons.

1) If there are other newbie bloggers or soon-to-be bloggers out there they might see some of my stumbles and experiences and learn from them.

2) I hope to keep this blog going for a while and it will be interesting (and painful) to watch my writing develop over time.  To see my voice develop.

3) It's for me.

Whys and wherefores

Who am I?

Casually Odd (née Lurking reader)


Why am I doing this?

I don’t know. Well, that’s not strictly true. I have some ideas of why but it would be hard to put them into words. I think, for now, it would be safe to say that I’m doing this because I want to.


What is the focus?

The initial focus of the blog will be World of Warcraft. I have a fair number of other passions and such but, I’ll probably (initially) keep it narrowly focused. This is for a couple of reasons, but I think the key one is that I’m still learning how to do this and haven’t found my voice. As I grow more confident about how I write and what I want to put out there, I’m sure I’ll add other miscellanea.


How long have I been playing?

Since February 2007, it would seem.


What do I play?

All of it. Alliance and Horde. All races. All classes. All specs. None of it very well, but trying to have fun in all of it. I am an altoholic through and through.


What type of player am I?

I feel as if I straddle a line between casual and hardcore but I’m not sure. I plan to write on this later to try to explain and explore this idea.


Who do I read?
Look to the right and you’ll see lots of interesting people and opinions. Most are of the writers have opinions pretty close to my own, however their gameplay can be very different and open up a lot of new experiences. And we do have some divergence of opinion, although none of them know that yet because they don’t know about this blog. So there’s that.


Who is [SPOUSE]?
I have a spouse with whom I play a lot of WoW. (How’s that for Up With Which I Will Not Put?) In the beginning, I plan to be as genderless as possible. The reasons are neither interesting nor compelling, but they simply are. I’m sure I’ll slip up or give up within short-order, but for now, I’ll use [SPOUSE] or [GENDER PRONOUN] or their or whatever to deal with it.

My apologies if it bothers you, but don’t worry, I doubt it will come up much. What, never? Well, hardly ever.


Do I have a schedule for updating?

Not yet but I’m hoping to set one up. I think I should start slow, perhaps Monday, Wednesday, and Friday with additional random updates if they are needed? I’d love to be able to produce daily but that’s a long ways off I think. I’m also skeptical about the reality of weekend updates. Or if I have them they’re more likely to be scheduled ones rather than anything reacting to current news or events.